Some people come to Church, they play around.. but when it comes time to marry, they come to select spouses from Church.
If you're not serious with your spiritual life, your values will attract similar people.
The spiritually serious ones will not follow you and even you will be put off by them. You need to make a commitment to God to grow and to prepare to be an asset to whoever it is that will marry you.
Having done that, the rest is easy. When you feel you're prepared, you're ready, the next thing is to position yourself where someone can see you and where you can see someone.
To the guys first: he who finds a wife finds a good thing. To find something, you have to look for it.
So there's no point staying in your bedroom and fasting for 40 days.
All you will see there will be angels. It's not that prayer is not important, absolutely important-you need to get a revelation first... God needs to be speaking to you. But you need to watch and pray. Open your eyes... Where are the places where you meet people?
At work: you can meet people at work
In your neighbourhood: get involved or at least make friends in the neighbourhood.
Maintain your relationships with your relations and your friends.
Visit people. You'll be surprised how someone visits someone and then meets the person's cousin etc. Many marriages have been formed that way.
Some people ask, "Is matchmaking okay?" - some people don't want to hear about it. They say - "I want to be led by the spirit of God." That's okay... it's just that, when it comes to seeing the person physically, you can only be in one place at a time.
You have only two eyes, you don't have twenty-four; so the possibility is that - someone who knows you may be the one to see the person.
So, if someone sees the person that you cannot see, the person should be able to mention to you that they saw the answer to your prayer.
Church - and you won't meet people if as soon as the service closes you carry your bags and leave. You meet in the place of service. In the place of commitment to God's work; because He said you shouldn't worry about what other people worry about; you should seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness; every other thing will be added to you.
Serve God, join departments. Join a small group in Church, serve actively. That's one place you meet people with similar values.
I believe therefore that holy spirit inspired match-making is possible. Note: Holy Spirit inspired, not matchmaking made by anxiety.
Sometimes the person will just know it because they care deeply enough about someone. They see someone and just have a witness "I think this is it" (i.e. what my friend has been searching for).
Of course, some people ask "how about online dating?" because there are websites on the internet, is that spiritual?"
Well...when the bible was written there was no internet. But how come we don't ask whether or not it's spiritual to sell things on the internet?
When it comes to making money, it's the will of God, when it comes to meeting someone to marry why shouldn't it be the will of God?
People meet on the internet these days so it's a possibility. But I will ask you to be very careful. Because that well-packaged person you see on the website may be lying. Serious deception is possible on the internet.
Pray. Then, once you find someone you think is the person, pray some more.
Do your research. Ask the person questions. It's okay to take the person out. You're adults, there is no point in playing games. Ask as many questions as you can about the person's background.
Find out what the person likes, what the person doesn't like, their values and so on. And... get some of your friends who are spiritual to pray along with you.
If you feel stronger about this thing, mention it to a Pastor or to a leader in Church.
These are your safety nets. This is one of the most important decisions you're making in your life. Get other people to help you to pray about it.
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